Ivy: Ready To Ship — Or, How I Accidentally Became an Expert on Doll Logistics

The “She’s Already in California” Revelation

There’s this moment—when you’re browsing late at night and your brain is basically oatmeal—where you see something like Ivy: Ready To Ship and think, wow, the future really did get weird. Not that I’m judging. Anyway, Ivy isn’t hiding out in a warehouse somewhere in Shanghai or being assembled by robot arms as we speak. Nope. She’s just... in California. Like, right now. This doll is stored in our California warehouse and ready to ship; she’ll show up at your door in 3-7 business days after you order. Which is faster than some pizza places around here.

No Surprises (Unless You Count the Obvious)

Ivy comes exactly as pictured—no mystery box nonsense or “surprise! her hair is purple now.” You get the removable vagina option (yep), gel breasts (squishier than I expected, honestly), standing feet (which is… practical?), and that’s it. No customizations with this one unless you want to wait longer—which, I mean, if you’re reading this section of absolute sex dolls listings, waiting probably isn’t your thing.

Petite But Not Invisible

The first time I saw Ivy’s measurements listed out, I remember thinking: people really do care about decimal points when it comes to these things? She clocks in at 5 feet 2 inches tall (or 160 cm if you’re feeling continental), weighs about 75 lbs—which is heavier than it sounds when you try to move her—and has those petite A-cup proportions that some folks are apparently into. Bust: 27 inches. Waist: 22 inches. Hips: 36.5 inches.

Details That Sound Clinical But Aren’t

Okay, here’s where things get a little clinical but also kind of fascinating in a weird way? Vaginal depth: 6.7 inches; anal depth: same; mouth: slightly less at 5.1 inches (I guess mouths are just smaller). And yes—steel skeleton with movable joints so she can pose for whatever scenario your exhausted imagination still manages to conjure up after work.

When Speed Actually Matters

It turns out there are people who need their dolls fast—I mean really fast—and don’t want to fuss over picking eye color #47 or “what shade of French manicure would she have?” If that’s not you… well then there’s always the customize link (“please click here,” which sounds almost apologetic). But if you want her fast and like her exactly as shown with no customizations? Ivy’s already boxed up and waiting for a new zip code.

Random Tangent Because My Brain Wandered

Do you ever wonder how many dolls are just chilling in warehouses across America right now? Just standing there—well, not standing obviously unless they have the standing feet upgrade—but existing quietly behind locked doors while everyone else goes about their day buying groceries or doomscrolling on their phones? It gets me every time.

Why Some People Don’t Wait for Customization Anymore

Maybe it’s impatience or maybe it’s just wanting what you see without all the extra steps—I don’t know, sometimes clicking 'add to cart' feels easier than filling out forms anyway. There are plenty of absolute sex dolls on offer but most aren’t sitting around ready to be shipped from California with everything already sorted out for whoever wants them next.

It Never Really Feels Like Shopping For Anything Normal

Every time someone asks me what buying one of these dolls was like I sort of laugh because… well—it wasn’t like shopping for shoes or even electronics online where tracking updates make sense and nobody judges your choices except maybe yourself later at night when insomnia hits hard again.

Anyway—if speed matters more than customization and you actually prefer things simple? Ivy might be waiting closer than you'd think.

And yeah—I keep wondering who names these things too—but that's another story altogether.