Scarlett: The School Girl Sex Doll That’s Supposed to Make Men Fall in Love

This is probably the weirdest thing I’ve written about.

Or, maybe not—honestly, my browser history is a mess these days. Anyway. The point: Scarlett, the so-called platinum blonde goddess from Absolute Sex Dolls, keeps popping up on those late-night “you might also like” ads. You know the ones.

I’ll admit it right now: I’m skeptical. Everyone says men fall in love with Scarlett on sight, but… really? She’s a doll. A school girl sex doll with this whole horse trainer backstory (she works at an equestrian ranch in Phoenix, Arizona—someone had fun writing that). Supposedly she spends her days breaking horses and her nights breaking men. Subtle.

Blonde Bombshell or Just Clever Marketing?

Let’s talk details because that’s where things usually fall apart for me.

Scarlett’s got B-cup tits (not too big, not too small), a slim waist—19 inches if you care—and legs that apparently go on forever. Her proportions feel engineered to tick every box: 5 feet 2 inches tall (which is 157 cm for people who don’t think in feet), 62 pounds (28kg) so she won’t break your back moving her around… unless you’re way out of shape, which I guess happens.

The marketing calls her a “platinum blonde goddess.” There are pictures everywhere of this tpe school girl sex doll looking all innocent and mischievous at once—a look only dolls can pull off without getting arrested.

Features That Sound Impressive Until You Think About Them

Steel skeleton with movable joints! Vaginal, anal, and oral sex possible! Free international shipping! Discreet packaging! All true—I checked twice because I didn’t want some nosy neighbor seeing a giant box labeled “HORSE-TRAINER SEX DOLL” show up at my door.

But here’s where my eyebrow went up: hole depth measurements. Vagina: 6.7 inches; anus: same; mouth: just over five inches deep. It feels clinical when you read it like that—almost like they’re selling kitchen appliances instead of something meant for intimacy or whatever passes for it these days.

The Whole Ranch Fantasy Thing

I keep circling back to this ranch story they give her. Scarlett isn’t just any blonde teen sex doll; she’s got a job wrangling horses under the Arizona sun before coming home to—well—wrangle something else entirely. There’s something both hilarious and slightly unsettling about giving your absolute sex dolls such elaborate lives.

I mean—I get it, kind of? People want more than just looks; they want personality (even if it’s pure fiction). But does anyone really buy into this whole rodeo-loving-girl-will-keep-you-exercised-in-the-bedroom pitch? Maybe some do. Maybe I’m too jaded by years of clickbait headlines and fake profiles on dating apps.

Shipping Realities & Small Annoyances

Not going to lie—the three-week delivery estimate made me roll my eyes a bit harder than usual. Two weeks processing plus another week for shipping (assuming no customs drama). On the bright side, discreet packaging means nobody has to know what you’re up to unless you tell them—or accidentally leave the instruction manual out.

One detail I almost missed: WM Doll makes her—which is kind of reassuring? They’ve been around awhile; their stuff doesn’t usually fall apart after three uses like some cheap knockoffs floating around online shops.

A Tangent About Expectations vs Reality

Here’s where things wander off track for a second—but stay with me. Years ago I remember thinking how strange it was that people could form attachments to objects with faces and stories attached—action figures as a kid, then video game avatars later on… Now grown adults are buying school girl dolls named Scarlett who “break men in.” Is this progress or just new flavors of loneliness?

Maybe both?

Would I Recommend Her?

Eh…

If you’re after skinny blonde teen vibes wrapped up in an oddly detailed narrative—and don’t mind waiting—it seems like Scarlett delivers exactly what she promises on paper (or plastic?). TPE skin does feel surprisingly real if you haven’t tried it yet; not warm-blooded obviously but close enough after dark when your standards drop anyway.

She’ll never text you back or ask why you’re still awake at 3am binging old sitcoms instead of sleeping next to someone real—that counts for something depending what kind of night you’re having.

That said—I still don’t buy all this “men fall in love instantly” stuff unless we’re talking about lonely guys who already fell out of love with reality itself ages ago… but hey, maybe there’s comfort in that sometimes too?

Anyway—I guess if you want your own little piece of equestrian fantasy delivered straight from Absolute Sex Dolls’ warehouse (in plain brown wrapping), now you know what waits inside the box.